The beginning of a new life - marriage and love - An Ai create image

🌿 Introduction

Marriage, though often praised as a sacred bond, is in truth a union of two ever-changing individuals living within an impermanent world.
Buddhism views all relationships — including marriage — as conditioned phenomena (saṅkhāra), arising and ceasing based on causes and conditions.
Modern psychology, too, recognizes that every emotional connection evolves with time, affected by biological, psychological, and social dynamics.

Thus, the Buddhist and scientific understandings converge beautifully: both affirm that impermanence (anicca) is woven into the fabric of human love


              The value of a beautiful, heart-warming togetherness -An Ai create image


💞 The Nature of Married Life

Marriage is not merely a social contract or romantic attachment; it is a field of constant learning.
Two distinct individuals, each with their own karmic pasts and perceptions, attempt to live in harmony — a process that demands patience, compassion, and mindfulness.

When attachment, ego, and expectations dominate, suffering (dukkha) inevitably arises.
But when understanding, kindness, and wisdom prevail, marriage becomes a path of spiritual growth rather than a battlefield of desires.

🌸 Impermanence Within the Union

In the teachings of the Buddha, impermanence applies to everything — emotions, bodies, relationships, and even vows of love.
Love itself is transient, flowing like a river — sometimes calm, sometimes turbulent.

True wisdom lies not in denying this change, but in embracing it with awareness.
The Sigalovada Sutta describes marriage not as ownership but as mutual respect and moral responsibility — a sacred partnership grounded in virtue, not attachment.

                  The beginning of discord - the sleeping place catches fire-An Ai create image         


💔 Causes Behind Divorce

Modern sociology identifies several common causes of divorce:

•           Financial stress

•           Infidelity and distrust

•           Poor communication

•           Emotional distance

•           Unresolved conflict and psychological strain

             Infidelity & Extramarital Affairs

             Sexual Incompatibility

             Domestic Violence

            Unrealistic Expectations

             Substance Abuse

Buddhism interprets these same issues through the lens of the three poisons: lobha (greed), dosa (anger), and moha (delusion).
When couples are guided by craving rather than compassion, separation becomes inevitable.


                         The heartfelt affection of true marriage / An Ai create image


🪷 Duties of Husband and Wife (According to the Sigalovada Sutta)

The Husband’s Duties Toward His Wife

1.      Should treat her with love and respect.

2.      Should not belittle or humiliate her.

3.      Should be faithful and refrain from misconduct.

4.      Should entrust household responsibilities to her wisely.

5.      Should provide what is needed for her happiness and well-being.

The Wife’s Duties Toward Her Husband

1.      Should organize and care for household duties efficiently.

2.      Should be courteous toward his friends and relatives.

3.      Should be faithful and pure in conduct.

4.      Should safeguard the family’s wealth and income.

5.      Should be diligent, calm, and responsible.

These mutual duties form the ethical foundation of Buddhist household life — a system of balance, compassion, and shared respect.

                      When marriage is a fire, the couple burns out / An Ai create image


🌼 Buddhist Reflection

Divorce, in the Buddhist view, is not a sin — it is simply a result of conditions changing.
When harmony fades and mutual growth ceases, separation may even become a compassionate act — a release from clinging and suffering for both parties.

The Buddha’s teaching reminds us:

“All things arise and pass away — understanding this truth brings peace.”

Thus, whether one stays in marriage or steps away, what matters most is the cultivation of loving-kindness (mettā), compassion (karuṇā), and wisdom (paññā).

✨ Closing Thought

Marriage, when seen through the eyes of the Dhamma, is not merely a romantic union — it is a mirror reflecting our attachment, patience, and compassion.
To love wisely is to understand impermanence.
To live kindly is to let go without hatred.
And to truly be together is to grow, not to possess.

“The lotus blooms even in muddy waters — so can love, when nourished by wisdom.” 🌸

 

📜 Sources and References

·         Dīgha Nikāya – Sigalovada Sutta

·         Aṅguttara Nikāya – Satta Bhariya Sutta

·         American Psychological Association (APA), Marriage and Relationship Studies, 2023

·         Buddhist Psychology Texts on Impermanence and Emotional Awareness